


The Type of Girl You Like

by decaf and sleep (kohiii), iShip (milktea_s)



Category: Vampire Knight (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Character Death, Disturbing Themes, F/M, Implied Relationships, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, One-Sided Relationship, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-10
Updated: 2020-05-10
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:34:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24106795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kohiii/pseuds/decaf%20and%20sleep, https://archiveofourown.org/users/milktea_s/pseuds/iShip
Summary: All he really wanted was to be enough for Zero. Enough to keep Zero's attentions. Enough to keep Zero by his side.
Relationships: Kiryuu Zero & Kuran Kaname, Kiryuu Zero/Kuran Kaname
Comments: 20
Kudos: 53





	The Type of Girl You Like

**Author's Note:**

> can you guess which song this fic is based on? ;)

He couldn't remember the last time his beloved had been home. 

Kaname stared hollowly at the vacant side of the large bed, stretching out his arm and imagining that he could still feel the lingering warmth of Zero's body. He was tired of coming home to an empty house and cold sheets. 

Just where had it all gone wrong? 

Was he so repulsive that Zero felt the need to find comfort in another's arms?

Without his beloved by his side, everything he had accomplished felt so meaningless. He was the talk of the neighborhood for his good looks and successful career, but Kaname would trade it all away in a heartbeat for Zero's affection. 

All he really wanted was to be _enough_ for Zero. Enough to keep Zero's attentions. Enough to keep Zero by his side.

Zero's approval was the only thing he sought, and yet it was the only thing that was denied him. 

Was he so unlovable that even his own beloved could not remain faithful to him?

Kaname buried his face into the unused pillow on the other side of the bed. 

If he closed his eyes, he could pretend that Zero was simply freshening up in the bathroom and would soon return. And when he saw Kaname's sulking form, his eyes would light up in fond exasperation before gently trying to coax Kaname out of his bad mood…

That night, Kaname slept with a smile, dreaming of being wrapped in his beloved's arms.

\--

It was a betrayal of the worst kind. 

Kaname's body shook as he fought down his nausea and pain. He wanted to look away, but his eyes were helplessly fixated on the scene playing out in front of him.

_How could he?_

His beloved's back was turned to him, but Kaname would recognize that distinct crown of silver locks anywhere. Zero was quietly talking to a beautiful brown-haired woman, who kept shamelessly smiling at whatever sweet words Zero was whispering into her ear. She blushed prettily before stepping back and doing a twirl, as if to show off the butterfly-patterned kimono she was wearing.

It felt like the world was mocking him. 

Despite the warmth of the sun, all Kaname could feel was a cold numbness seeping into his bones. 

It was one thing to be aware of his beloved's unfaithfulness -- it was another to actually witness it in person. 

What was it about this woman that Zero found irresistible? Did Zero find the way he dressed lacking? Kaname knew that he had a tendency to favor a more austere style of dress -- even his best friend had commented on how 'depressing' Kaname's wardrobe was. If Zero desired it so, Kaname would gladly set aside his personal preferences for something more to his beloved's taste. 

He watched enviously as Zero placed a hand on the small of the woman's back and led her away. Kaname watched with a sinking heart as the woman pressed closer to Zero, who turned to smile at her. There was a certain tenderness to the subtle gesture. Why had Zero never been like this with him? 

Was he too reserved? Did he not smile enough? Did Zero want him to be more demonstrative with his affections, to share his feelings more openly?

He couldn't keep himself from thinking about what they might be doing. There was a part of him that itched to follow the two, but at the same time Kaname felt paralyzed with dread. As much as he wanted to know, there was a greater part of him that wished to remain ignorant of what his beloved was truly doing behind his back.

No -- he _had_ to. 

Because if his worst fears were confirmed, then there would be no going back. At least with this, Kaname could pretend that Zero still held some semblance of fondness for him. He could still pretend that Zero's absences were due to work, that the woman Zero spoke so tenderly to was just a close friend -- that Zero would eventually return to his side. 

Kaname sighed, resigning himself to another night in a cold, empty bed.

\--

Package in hand, Kaname opened the door to the tailor's shop and stepped inside. He rang the bell on the counter, carefully placing down the wrapped bundle and smoothing out any wrinkles that distorted the fabric. 

As he waited for the tailor, his wandering eyes fell upon the headline of today's news. 

"Awful business, isn't it?" the tailor asked as he emerged from the back room. "It's hard to imagine that someone in the neighborhood would do something like this."

Kaname nodded absentmindedly, picking up the newspaper and quickly scanning through the story. His expression morphed into one of concern.

"How awful indeed," he murmured. 

"So what can I do for you today?" 

With one last look at the article, Kaname turned his attention back to detailing his order. The tailor seemed a little puzzled, but nevertheless assured Kaname that he would be able to fulfill the request. 

On his way back home, Kaname wondered where Zero was right now. As he had predicted, the other side of the bed had remained untouched and Kaname had woken up alone again. He had struggled to fall asleep, and what little slumber he managed had been plagued by nightmares from the knowledge that his beloved’s arms were wrapped around someone else.

As if summoned from his thoughts, Zero appeared in his vision just as he turned the corner. Kaname stopped in his tracks, blinking dazedly, and wondered if it were all a trick of the light. 

His beloved's form was crumpled in distress, and Kaname ached to wipe away the downcast look marring Zero's features. Before he could do anything, he noticed that Zero wasn't alone. His beloved was accompanied by a pretty young woman. But what struck him the most was her brown hair with its gentle curls, just like the other woman he had seen Zero with before.

Was that the type of girl Zero liked? 

Kaname's face fell as he watched the young woman place a comforting hand on Zero's arm, her expression filled with soft concern. 

He couldn't help but feel like the young woman bore an eerie resemblance to him, and if Kaname ignored her long hair and soft curves, he could easily imagine that it was him who was by Zero's side. The color and pattern of her sash suited her, its orchid pattern highlighting her delicate feminine features. Perhaps if he donned something similar, it too would make him more attractive in Zero's eyes?

Kaname was well aware that his good looks generally veered toward the more androgynous side, but at the moment all he could think about was how everything about him was a touch too masculine. There were too many angles and not enough curves, the hard lines of his body betraying his very much male physique. 

He resented his circumstance, of being born in a body that Zero did not find desirable.

\--

So perhaps Zero wasn't only into petite, brown-haired women. 

Kaname clenched his fist as he silently surveyed the scene taking place across the street from him. He now regretted taking the scenic route to the tailor's, because surely anything else would've been better than this revolting sight.

In front of the all girls' boarding school was Zero, quietly speaking to a young lady draped in a black coat several sizes too large to be hers.

At first, Kaname tried to convince himself that there was nothing going on. After all, she had to be way too young to be involved with Zero in _that_ way. Surely he was overthinking things.

Then Zero reached out to fix the black ribbon in the young lady's silver hair, and Kaname's heart broke at the open display of affection. There was no mistaking the look of love in Zero's eyes. 

For a moment, he was indignant -- was it that anyone other than him would do? Just how low was Zero willing to fall, shamelessly seeking the attentions of a mere _girl_?

But then his anger slowly seeped out of him, leaving him feeling defeated and hopeless. It seemed like no matter what he did, no matter how hard he tried, Kaname would never be enough for Zero. Despite the efforts he put into changing himself for the sake of his beloved, Zero didn't notice any of it. Zero's half of the bed remained cold and untouched, and Kaname was still going home to an empty house. 

What was it about him that was lacking? Why did Zero feel the need to turn to other women when he had Kaname, ever faithful and willing to do anything for him?

Unable to bear the misery of watching his beloved with another, Kaname turned away and hurried off to the tailor's shop.

\--

As he slipped his arms through the sleeves of the kimono, Kaname wondered if Zero would be happy to see him. 

With the escalating number of crimes in the neighborhood, Kaname could no longer sit back as the days crawled by. Every single day without Zero was pure agony.

He was worried about his beloved, and since Zero had no intention of returning home, Kaname had no choice but to go and meet him in person. He had to see with his own eyes to make sure that Zero was safe. 

Tying the sash around his waist, Kaname reached for the comb and ran it gently through his hair. 

He wanted to look his best for his beloved.

Turning to look at his reflection in the mirror, Kaname finally smiled in satisfaction. 

The beauty in the mirror surely was the type of girl Zero liked best. Brown hair with a gentle curl, brightly colored kimono with a butterfly pattern, elegant sash decorated with embroidered orchids, and a black ribbon tied into a delicate bow. 

_Am I beautiful enough for you now, Zero?_

\-- 

"Isn't it terrible, Zero?" Kaname set down the morning's paper, turning to look at his beloved who had finally returned home. "They're saying an entire family of four has been killed by someone." 

He was glad he had caught Zero in time. 

Although it had taken some convincing on his part, Kaname's persistence had paid off. There were still many unspoken things between them, but for now at least, he was with Zero again. Just having Zero by his side was enough. Kaname regretted the forceful method he had to employ to bring Zero home, but he was willing to spend the rest of his days making it up to his beloved.

"I'm glad you came to your senses," he reached for Zero's hand. "I've really missed you." 

Now that Zero was willing to give him a chance, Kaname would do whatever it took to prove himself to his beloved. 

Curling his fingers around Zero's, Kaname leaned into Zero's body and pressed a brief kiss to the other man's temple. Zero was as silent as always, and Kaname wished that his beloved would at least say something in response to Kaname's gestures of affection. Holding back his hurt, Kaname smiled weakly. 

It was alright. They had plenty of time to make things work. 

Lifting a pale hand up to his lips, Kaname kissed every knuckle gently, ignoring the cold and limp way his beloved's fingers rested in his hold. He wrapped his arms around Zero's unmoving form.

"I love you. Don't worry, I'll make sure to keep you safe forever."

\--

_"Hello, is there something you need from me?"_

_When Kaname approached Zero, the silver-haired man had seemed lost in thought, his expression stricken with grief. Kaname had waited expectantly for his beloved to address him._

_Yet, Zero's first words to him were of polite confusion, as if he were speaking to a complete stranger. Kaname was distraught at how coldly Zero was treating him. No matter what he said, Zero seemed determined to pretend that they didn't know each other. His eyes were still distant, as if Kaname didn't even register in his mind._

_Too caught in the grief of having lost his wife and daughters, it took a while for Zero to notice something was amiss about the beautiful stranger in front of him._

_His eyes widened in horror at the realization that Kaname was dressed in a ghastly amalgamation of his deceased loved ones. He choked back a sob as he recognized the familiar butterfly pattern on the man's kimono. It was the very same pattern that Yuuki wore, the day before she'd been brutally murdered. And the orchid-patterned sash had been Ai's favorite, the black ribbon he himself had secured in Ren's hair._

_Kaname's gaze sharpened as he watched his beloved's eyes flash with fear and alarm. Zero looked like he was ready to bolt, his mouth opening to form a cry for help._

_Well._

_That simply wouldn't do._

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> (this fic was based on an old song, [the tailor shop on enbizaka](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etn41n6wtAQ))
> 
> uhhh oops? hope you enjoyed reading this piece of work 😂😂😂  
> (in case it wasn't clear, in this AU zero and kaname are strangers. their 'relationship' is all in kaname's head. and yes, kaname killed them all -- zero, his wife yuuki, his daughters ai and ren. and he kept zero's corpse beside him. you all can blame ship for the ending, because even i was not originally going to go with this ending.)


End file.
